Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Despair? Despondency? No. Apathy and Exhaustion.

My work schedule has finally caught up to me. Working all the time has broken me. I used to be a fairly emotional person and these days I don't seem to feel much besides a general lack of anything. I don't really care anymore. I'm just tired.

It's a grey dreary and sticky day. My coworker has the lights off because she has a headache. It's dark in here, with glows from the computer screens. It's pretty dark inside me too.

I had the hardest time crawling out of bed today. I was up late last night because I had to pick the Husband up from work. I thought I would be mad at him because he "got talking" to his coworkers and ended up calling an hour after he had finished. I don't mind if he wants to hang out with his friends, but he knew I was waiting for him so I could go to bed. He called about 10 minutes after I fell asleep. It made it hard to get back to sleep when we got home. But I didn't feel angry. I didn't feel anything but tired. Even today I can't seem to get het up about it.

My arms and legs are pretty heavy today. I have been trying to get more exercise so maybe I just pushed it too hard. But I don't want to move and just want to be in bed. My throat feels funny, not yet sore but not right.

Okay I am done complaining. Not much can change for a while I just have to deal. Life goes on whether or not you want it to.

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